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Charles the parrot fucking loves River Phoenix. He keeps two portraits of the young dead actor hanging in his cage. One is a crude white and grey affair made from Charles's poop while the other is composed entirely from the small black seeds that fall out of his bird feeder. If Charles could talk he would refer to them as "The Rivers". He likes to make small adjustments to each one every day, getting closer and closer to a true representation of Phoenix himself. If the corgi puppies could talk they would probably make nonchalant comments in the morning on the way to their food bowls like "How are the Rivers today, Charles?" or "The Rivers are looking good this morning!". Charles will face The Rivers and pretend that he is acting out various scenes from his favorite River films. Sometimes he is Keanu Reeve's Scott Favor to Phoenix's Mike Waters or Kevin Kline's Joey Boca to Phoenix's Devo Nod. When Charles is in his cups (which is literally never because he is a parrot) he will go off on long soliloquies about the timeless tragedy of early death amongst the young, beautiful, rich, and talented. Best not to dwell on Charles's nighttime fantasies of The Rivers.

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from Three For Silver, released May 22, 2013

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Three For Silver Bellingham, Washington

made up music played on made up instruments by made up people

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